RV!: Saw (2004), RV!: Saw II (2005), RV!: Saw III (2006), RV!: Saw IV (2007), RV!: Saw V (2008) and RV!: Saw VI (2009)

RV!: Saw (2004) Dir: James Wan Date Released: October 2004 Date Seen: August 14, 2010 Rating: 1/5

RV!: Saw II (2005) Dir: Darren Lynn Bousman Date Released: October 2005 Date Seen: August 14, 2010 Rating: 1.5/5

RV!: Saw III (2006) Dir: Darren Lynn Bousman Date Released: October 2006 Date Seen: August 14, 2010 Rating: 1.25/5

RV! Saw IV (2007) Dir: Darren Lynn Bousman Date Released: October 2007 Date Seen: August 14, 2010 Rating: 1.25/5

RV!: Saw V (2008) Dir: David Hackl Date Released: October 2008 Date Seen: August 14, 2010 Rating: 1.75/5

RV!: Saw VI (2009) Dir: Kevin Greutert Date Released: October 2009 Date Seen: August 15, 2010 Rating: 1.25/5

Ok. Ok. OK! So I was going to do something with all this rewatching, some kind of video essay with Matt Seitz. Our respective schedules didn't match up however so this project got shelved, unfortunately. I say "unfortunately" ecause while rewatching these movies was pretty excruciating, it did give me a sense of perspective on the franchise in general and why it really does deserve better critics than it's gotten. The films' soap opera melodramatics look that much more impressive in a scuzzy, over-achieving kind of way when viewed back-to-back like this. A myriad plot points are retconned into existence with all the skill of a magician producing different colored scarves out of his ass in a daisy chain. Which is actually pretty interesting when you consider how the films' emphasis on timed traps works: you can only move the narratives' immediate events forward by going backward. That's actually a pretty impressive conceit for such a lunk-headed series and the main reason why I think the Saw movies are so morbidly fascinating.

226) Saw II (2005)

226) Saw II (2005) Dir: Darren Lynn Bousman Date Released: October 2005 Date Seen: July 26th, 2009 Rating: 1.5/5

I watch the Saw films knowing that they're no kind of good. While Saw II may be a smidge above the other entries in the pedantic franchise--it provides the clearest version of its serial killer hero Jigsaw's manifesto on how torture makes victims appreciate life and avoids the convoluted plots of the sequels that followed--it's just as bad as the rest of them conceptually. In many ways, it does what Jigsaw's traps does: forces the viewer into a corner where it inhumanly assaults them--mostly with bad dialogue and acting; the sadistic violence isn't anything new under the sun, just a little more constipated that its giallo and slasher influences--with every rusty hook in its arsenal of convoluted but fairly dull provocations. Survivors will appreciate quality horror films more afterwards knowing that they have seen some of the worst and lived to like the rest. Moral panic, my ass.